Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Engrish for your feel good

Mirror Mat is a sheet of pre-cut, mirror, mosaic-sized tiles with self-adhesive backing. If you choose to become a proud crafter of Mirror Mat be aware that:
‘It is made by the small parts, so please be cautious to small children’.
Possibly the only product made entirely by deviant*, Oompa Loompa prosthetic, factory workers. Or a great insult to the product’s Chinese factory workers’ size and skills [mock earnest nod]
One of the reasons you should buy this product is because:
‘It is a funky sticky!’

Relaxation Balls are a pair of hollow metal balls with two toned, internal chimes. They massage your hands and aid relaxation. An example of traditional Chinese therapy,
‘When the Healthy Ball came out it was used to improve physical conditions and mould temperament, and was popular among the people market.’
It was a failure with the marine mammal and farmyard animal markets due to a lack of hands in the targeted demographic.


*Hence the need for caution. Normal Oompa Loompas are entirely trustworthy…more so if they have their bodies with them.


In other news...

Danced to 'Question of Time' at Golgotha on Monday. That song rocks on the dancefloor! Wore a set of batwings I made especially for the night. Could feel them jiggling about on my back as I bouncily danced :)


Pic care of M.

2 comments:

Like You, i have a Hairy Lip said...

- yes, you look suitably gay!

Lady Meerkat said...

WTF?